Question 1

Are There Different Types Of Trauma & Why Do They Occur?

Accepted Answer

While trauma is often associated with extreme or catastrophic events (shock trauma), many don’t realize it can also stem from one-time or repeated experiences of “too much, too fast” or prolonged periods of “too little, for too long” (developmental or relational trauma). In both cases, the nervous system can become stressed and overwhelmed when there is not enough internal or external support to fully process and move through what happened. Left unresolved, this can leave lingering physiological, emotional, and mental distress, along with a sense that something about the experience (and its context) remains unfinished or difficult to manage.​Trauma can vary widely in how it presents and in its severity. Some experiences may lead to intense, long-lasting effects, while others create subtler patterns that are easier to overlook or discount. Many people have had at least one life experience that felt overwhelming or exceeded their available resources and support, even if they would not intentionally or initially describe it as “trauma.”

Question 2

How Can Trauma Create a “Gap”?

Accepted Answer

We can think of trauma as leaving a kind of wound or significant disruption when the nervous system becomes overwhelmed during an acute or prolonged highly stressful life experience and we are unable to move through it with enough safety, support, or resources. This can mean never reaching a felt sense that the danger has ended, that we made it through, or that we now have what we need to respond differently if a similar situation arises again. When trauma occurs, we likely did not have the opportunity to access or develop the capacities, resources, and ways of responding that could help us feel safer and better prepared for similar situations in the future. In the place of that wound, there can be a kind of “gap,” where the nervous system develops protective coping strategies to manage what still feels unsafe, overwhelming, or unresolved and in an attempt to meet a true, underlying need for safety or healthy protection. In most professional settings, I use terms such as “capacity or skill gaps,” “stress responses,” and “improving effectiveness” when discussing growth and behavior change, rather than framing the work around trauma or exploring a person’s specific trauma history.

Question 3

How Do Protective "Stress Response" Patterns Develop?

Accepted Answer

Over time, the nervous system aims to adapt to overwhelming, threatening, and unsafe experiences by forming protective, survival-based coping strategies — patterns of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that help us move through life with some degree of felt safety and protection from future harm. These strategies prioritize immediate safety and survival over longer-term desired results, and they often FEEL necessary or like the only option.​Examples of such strategies include automatic, reactive responses commonly described as fight (aggressive or passive aggressive behaviors), flight (e.g., escape or avoidance), freeze (e.g., feeling scared stiff or having parts of you partially shut down), fawn (e.g., people-pleasing), or fold/shutdown (e.g., resignation, depressive symptoms, or exhaustion). Our personal triggers can often elicit these kinds of responses.​While protective and useful at first, these strategies can become automatic and continue long after the original danger has passed. These patterns can become the very barriers to creating the kind of life we want deep down because they can limit our access to various authentic aspects and capabilities within us. This can make it harder to know our true selves, recognize our needs (discerning between urge and true need), set healthy boundaries, trust ourselves, feel at home in our bodies, reach meaningful goals, and navigate other areas of life with greater ease and greater personal and professional effectiveness.

Question 4

How Will We Start Shifting These Patterns & Is Coaching Always a Good Fit?

Accepted Answer

Trauma-informed coaching offers present-focused support for understanding and gently shifting protective patterns that arise, including nervous-system dysregulation — when stress or survival responses become difficult to settle, shift, or manage effectively. Rather than pushing immediately toward change, we build enough trust and support for you to to be able to observe how your nervous system responds (e.g., your thoughts, emotions, body sensations, and behaviors), explore what helps you return to greater steadiness, and identify what is needed for a different response to become possible and sustainable.  From there, we’ll identify manageable next steps at a pace that feels right — and safe — for you and your nervous system. This can be especially important when you’ve noticed that action planning and to-do lists alone haven't been enough because your automatic protective responses have prevented meaningful or sustainable progress and change.​Sometimes people need the support of a mental health therapist or other treatment, either instead of coaching or alongside it. If this applies to you, I’m happy to explore whether coaching or group work is a good fit for your needs and goals, as well as make a referral during our initial session or anytime that it might be helpful.

Question 5

How Will We Build What's Missing?

Accepted Answer

Our work isn’t only about shifting old patterns. It can also include practicing more effective responses and developing essential capacities and relationship skills that may not have fully formed because there wasn’t enough opportunity, support, or skillful modeling. These might include emotional regulation, clear communication, or respectful and effective boundary-setting. Because I’ve integrated these same practices into my own life, I can demonstrate them firsthand — offering not only helpful theory and frameworks, but also real-time modeling and embodied support.​​Through this process — and it is a process — you can gradually expand your nervous system’s capacity, strengthen self-trust, and experience greater confidence and possibility. The ultimate goal? To soften and eventually let go of patterns like perfectionism, avoidance, forcefulness, control, people-pleasing, or feeling stuck. This can include moving toward greater connection with yourself and others, more resilience, better outcomes at home and at work, and a deeper sense of being at home in yourself and your life — and to do your best work, whatever that work is.

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My approach to understanding and working with trauma

Describing my "trauma-informed" approach

SUMMARY

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

Are There Different Types Of Trauma & Why Do They Occur?

How Can Trauma Create a “Gap”?

How Do Protective "Stress Response" Patterns Develop?

How Will We Start Shifting These Patterns & Is Coaching Always a Good Fit?

How Will We Build What's Missing?

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